In an increasingly complex world, leaders need to move beyond developing skills in strategy, execution, and communication in order to become a human-centric leader who is able to connect authentically with themselves and their teams. This has been described by some leaders at McKinsey as an inside out journey that begins with presence rather than more tools and competencies.
There is a tendency for leaders to take control, be decisive, and then move quickly into execution. But what if a complex or tense situation does not call for action? What if, instead, it calls for you to create space for the right conditions and ideas to emerge?
Author Annie Peshkam asserts in her recent HBR article that leaders need to unlearn some habitual responses that hold them back:
- Unlearn the need for quick fixes –> Learn to take a reflective pause
- Unlearn superficial reassurance –> Name the difficulty
- Unlearn the impulse to avoid conflict –> Get comfortable holding the tension
- Unlearn being performative –> Build deeper emotional connections
- Unlearn hidden assumptions –> Relearn how to lead
“What people need first in complex moments is ‘holding.’ Holding is the work of thinking with people rather than for them. It’s offering reassurance without pretending to know all the answers.” Instead of providing answers and carrying the weight of decisions on your own, notice the hesitation or fear in the room, acknowledge what you’re seeing, and invite the group to engage and solve the problem together.
“Holding environments are a safe and steady space for people to grow, particularly in moments of discomfort. Leaders create them not by reducing pressure, but by helping the team to name what is difficult, and carry it together.”
Stay with the tension. Sit in the discomfort. It’s not easy or comfortable. But if you are comfortable navigating this space yourself, you create safety for your team to navigate the unknown together.
Which of these habits will you unlearn?
GO DEEPER: Read “To Lead Through Uncertainty, Unlearn Your Assumptions” by Annie Peshkam